Friday, November 27, 2009

From the Heart – Giving Unconditionally and Receiving with Gratitude

As sons and daughters of God we are called to give ourselves generously to the others as Christ gives Himself to us each and every day. Unconditional love is that spirit in which we give from our hearts without seeking recompense. Our giving should not be self-serving for our desire is always to bring joy to the other. Our gift to others is an extension of our love for Christ. Thus the familiar saying “you owe me one” has no place in the heart of one who tries to imitate the love of Christ. His love for us is unconditional, and we would do well to imitate Him. The Prayer of St. Francis is an example of the true spirit of giving.

Prayer of Saint Francis of Assisi
Lord, make me an instrument of your peace.
Where there is hatred, let me sow love;
where there is injury, pardon;
where there is doubt, faith;
where there is despair, hope;
where there is darkness, light;
and where there is sadness, joy.

O Divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek
to be consoled as to console;
to be understood as to understand;
to be loved as to love.
For it is in giving that we receive;
it is in pardoning that we are pardoned;
and it is in dying that we are born to eternal life. Amen

Gifts, whether they be monetary, or acts of kindness, are all manifestations of the love we have in our hearts. We have all been taught that it is better to give than to receive. However as we are called to give generously, we are also called to receive graciously with appreciation. Do we receive with the same spirit in which we give – from the heart? We have all been the recipient of an unexpected gift or an extraordinarily generous favor.  While we are touched and grateful, we none-the-less experience disappointment or sorrow if we are unable to reciprocate. While it is true that we are called to give to one another, we are not called to engage in a disingenuous buying competition to “pay back” or “settle the score”.  This practice, albeit well meaning, can quite easily become self-gratification if our need to appease our own conscience overshadows the other person’s gift to us. In such situations giving becomes all about us rather than all about the other. The greatest gift we can give is a heartfelt “thank you” to express our gratitude. In the gospel account of the curing of the ten lepers, Jesus took issue with the fact that only one person returned to give thanks, for all He asked of them was to give thanks and bring His message to the others. Christ asks us to express our gratitude and appreciation for any gift bestowed upon us by another. Thus our acceptance of a gift or charitable deed with gratitude IS our gift to the giver.

Recommended Reading: Friends of God, by St. Josemaria Escriva
Chapter: Detachment, Section: God Loves a Cheerful Giver
Chapter: The Strength of Love

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